25-year-old daughter provides for her family while working full-time from home, gets criticized by mom for putting a “Do Not Disturb” sign at her door: ‘She just barges in to talk’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Nov 28, 2025 2:00 PM EST

My husband and I have very few rules in our marriage, but here is one of them: On the day that I work from home every week, he must work from his office. He cannot be in our home when I am supposed to work from there; he is simply too distracting.

Considering that even this one person is too much for me to handle when I am supposed to work, I don't want to know how distracting it must be to work in a house with a full family, let alone a family with no sense of boundaries or respect for privacy.

That is what the daughter in the story below is currently dealing with. Even though she is the sole provider of her family, they have no problem making her job more difficult by constantly disturbing her. Since she works fully remotely and has a hard time concentrating as it is, she needed to find a solution.

When she put up a "Do Not Disturb" sign on her door and then locked it while she worked, her mom took offense, then made sure the entire family felt the same way…

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  • AITA for putting on a "Do Not Disturb" Sign at my Door?

    I (25F) work at home for five years and had been supporting my family with my dream job.
    via MIINTEU
  • Woman working from home
    via borchee

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I pay all the bills consistently and even buy groceries once in a while. I live with my my mom (59F) who's a housewife all her life, and my brother (44M) and SIL who both don't have jobs but does labor work in the house.
    via MIINTEU
  • My job pays well while I'm at home, and I genuinely like and thrive working in a peaceful setting where I'm not interrupted for eight hours a day, so I confined myself inside my room, which also serves as an office.
    via MIINTEU
  • My mother is aware that I dislike being bothered, but occasionally she just barges into my room to talk, gossip, do chores, etc., which is really quite distracting and makes it easy for me to lose focus.
    via MIINTEU
  • (I think I got ADHD, but I'm yet to be diagnosed.) I've recently gotten the idea of making my own "Do Not Disturb" sign after my niece had a birthday party in the house.
    via MIINTEU
  • It was noisy, so after interacting and buying the kids snacks, I've locked myself in my room, put on headphones, and became VERY productive with no disturbance at all.
    via MIINTEU
  • The sign I've made says "do not disturb, please contact me in messenger" to make sure I'm still accessible when needed during work hours.
    via MIINTEU
  • The problem: Earlier today, our electric wiring got fixed, which means I cannot work for a few hours with no lights on so I took a nap.
    via MIINTEU
  • Do Not Disturb Sign on a Door
    via SUMALI IBNU CHAMID

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • When I woke up, I saw my mom messaged me asking me to reimburse her the money she spent for the wiring.
    via MIINTEU
  • When I came out of the room, I asked her if she needed the money now.
    via MIINTEU
  • She replied "if you please" in a very rude tone, which took me aback. When I returned in my room to resume working now that the lights are back, I can hear her ranting why do I need to lock the door for and that I don't need privacy.
    via MIINTEU
  • I didn't listened further because I am honestly hurt. I have nothing but a good daughter for the family.
    via MIINTEU
  • I pay the bills monthly without any help from the family members, they still went ahead to gossip about me just because I've locked the door while working and getting mad for wanting privacy.
    via MIINTEU
  • AITA? The house is tense right now I'm still in my room atm balancing what I should do.
    via MIINTEU
  • Thank you for listening and please be gentle if I'm in the wrong.
    via MIINTEU
  • Trick_Few NTA There are 3 adults taking advantage of your generosity yet can't be bothered to respect your time. All 3 of them should have jobs to pay their own way in life. It certainly isn't your responsibility to make their lives easy while you work hard.
    via Trick_Few
  • OP MIINTEU the sad thing is that im the most competent in the family. I've worked and studied, never got trouble, and i actually love my job. my mother is the traditional conservative type who doesn't have her own job because she's the housewife, my brother doesn't have a job but does labor and fixing the house, and my SIL takes care of my niece. since im the one with the job, the financial responsibility falls onto me even though im the youngest in the family.
    via MIINTEU
  • abstract_lemons NTA. Seems like it's time to move to your own place. You do deserve privacy. But seriously, you have a house full of people. And you have a mother who's always barged in whenever she feels like it. What did you expect to happen when you suddenly started locking your door and put up a "do not disturb" sign? I'm not attacking you in any way. I agree with you. I also think that you need to understand that your current environment is what it's always been. And expecting it to change
    via abstract_lemons
  • OP MIINTEU i understand what you mean. it just iffs me that basic privacy is not part of her vocabulary. when i was younger, i used to lock the door when i'm getting dressed and she bangs at the door if i do that. if i explain to her why i locked it, her excuse was "why do you need to lock the door for? we're both girls" but i still want to dress up without another person in my room. i think she does have boundary issues now that i've grown up.
    via MIINTEU
  • Texas Gal0032548 NTA. Who owns the home? It's their responsibility to maintain the wiring, not yours. Remind them that your need for privacy pays all their bills. Consider moving if possible and leave them to fend for themselves.
    via TexasGal0032548
  • OP MIINTEU i do, the house is named after me. my family is poor, but this is the only inheritance i got from my parents so i can't even easily move out at all.
    via MIINTEU
  • appleblossom1962 NTA. Maybe have the sign say something like "work in process, do not disturb. Message me if needed". A gentle reminder that you are not isolating, but making money.
    via appleblossom1962
  • OP MIINTEU that's exactly what i did. the sign says in verbatim: DO NOT DISTURB * locked door * working * contact me in Messenger
    via MIINTEU
  • jewdiful NTA X1000 You literally support your whole family. You don't just need quiet to work, you deserve quiet to unwind from being the only one working They either start respecting you or you should think about making some changes. Your mom was being rude and so unfathomably ungrateful
    via jewdiful
  • _way2MuchTimeHere Girl move. They are manipulating you into staying. They don't respect you as a daughter They don't respect you as an adult They don't even respect you as their piggy bank. If they cannot even have some basic manners with the one footing the bill, there is no hope. Just move and don't let your mother guilt you into staying. Her punching herself to make you stay should have motivated you to leave even more. NTA
    via _way2MuchTimeHere

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family drama work from home aita employee job kids mother siblings work parenting family daughter women parents children Father
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